Now, some may
say this period of ‘rest & reflection’ was more akin to ‘grumpiness &
general tetchiness’ – and they would be right! I have not coped well with not
being able to do something when I have really, really wanted to. I mean, yes,
it has made me think things through, assess what I really get out of running
and exercise, what happens when I don’t do it, what goals I want to set myself
when I am back being able to put one foot in front of the other at an
acceptable speed that represents ‘running’. But maaaan, it has been a mental
struggle during this enforced down time. I have always known that I have run
for two main reasons – to keep me fit and keep the weight I worked so hard to
lose off and most importantly, to keep me sane. Frustration levels have reached
an all time high during this rest period, especially when I had to miss out on
a 20 mile training walk (I’m climbing Kilimanjaro in September with my two best
friends) I mean, not even being able to walk?! Gggrrr! I have also been
incredibly envious of my Twitter feed with all of the fab training, racing
& general miles of enjoyment that the people I follow have been able to do.
In actual fact, there has been pretty much radio silence from me over the past
month on Twitter (Oi, you, no cheering please!) bar the odd sporadic tweet. It doesn’t
mean I don’t care about my followers or those I follow, I just feel that I wasn’t
in the right place to contribute. It’s funny because Twitter is *the* most
supportive & encouraging place to be when you need it the most, i.e. at
times like this! With this in mind, you can see how it’s become a struggle for
me. I know it sounds dramatic, and boy, I can be such a drama queen at times, and
this is not a ‘woe is me’ post but it really has been an interesting/challenging
time, for sure!
NB: Just to note, Maltesers are lovely
an’ all, but they are not supportive or encouraging, other than they encourage
your weeble-while-you-can’t-run-status to grow. This is taken from firsthand experience
and is a warning to you all!
Things have
started to improve this week and although not 100% in the rib & surrounding
area, I took myself off to the gym for a wee trot on the dreadmill to test out
how I coped with a run. I was nervous. One, of being back in the gym after 4
weeks out after spending the time I would normally be training (at the gym or
running) stuffing my face with non-supportive Maltesers and two, if my ribs
weren’t healed enough, of doing more damage and putting me out for longer. Nobody
wants that, believe me! I chose the dreadmill rather than the road for
cushioning purposes. Believe me, it’s not my first choice for running, as the
name suggests! Long and short, it went OK; a gentle 5k plod and minimal pain
during running. My ribs and surrounding chest & back muscles ached like billio
the next day but not enough to put me off going back on Tuesday for another 20
minute trot and some leg work. The aches and pains on Wednesday prevented me
from even considering giving it another go though. Slowly, slowly, catchy
whatsitsface and all that!
I had drawn
the line in the sand a good few weeks back (see previous blog entry) and
although I had adopted the carefree non-pressured approach to running, I feel that this (enforced) break has done me so
much good. I had lost my way a little with running after doing so many events
last year and I had left my sense of enjoyment and ‘runners high’ somewhere on one
of my running routes. But now, although I am taking it very slowly for the next
few weeks and must remind myself not to get carried away, I’m ready to start
getting out of running & exercise the very things I forgot I loved so much
about it all. The goals have been set and will be worked towards – getting back
to being fit & healthy, successfully climbing Kilimanjaro in September and
completing Country to Capital 45 mile Ultra in January 2016. And any breaks
will be planned ones only!